Of Families, Dogs, and Forgiveness: Guest MINDSETTER™ Bugbee

Of Families, Dogs, and Forgiveness: Guest MINDSETTER™ Bugbee

I think it was 1967 or 1968.

My parents were getting ready to leave the home in Brewster, New York, that my brothers and I grew up in. And for some reason, I will never understand they decided to give “Mischief," our lovable family dog to our neighbors across the street when they moved. I could never understand this act of abandonment. 

Chris and I were away in college and had no ability to take her in. Bruce was off doing I don’t know what and couldn’t take her either. But we were really not given that option. Just a phone call telling us of their decision. As our nuclear family was splitting apart and my parents' marriage was fracturing as well, neither of them wanted our sweet, hairy family member so they just gave her away to the neighbors and never looked back. 

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The memory has always made me sad particularly since I have had a love affair with dogs of any variety, owned a dog business and have had a lifelong (theirs not mine) relationship with two Beagles (now senior citizens) who I love with all my heart. How could they have just turned their back on such a loving, dependent creature? 

Yesterday, in one of those crazy social media surprises that have become kind of normal in the internet age, I found myself on the phone with the mother who had lived across the street and taken “Missy” in. Now living in retirement in Westchester County, New York we had a sweet but brief conversation about the past: she asked about my brothers and I asked about her (younger than us) children (now middle-aged adults). 

As the call was coming to an end, she said “Oh, before I forget, do you remember my son Richie? Well, he wanted me to thank you for giving us your wonderful dog. We loved her so much and she was so sweet. He wanted you to know how grateful he was to have had her while he was growing up.” 

It made me very happy. And it helped me to forgive my parents for what had always seemed like a selfish abandonment. If they could no longer love and care for her the way we had...the best possible thing they could do was give her to a family that could...and they did. And I’m very grateful for that.          

One last thing... as we were saying goodbye she said, “You know, it was the strangest thing...we lived right across the street from your old house but Missy never went back there."

Of course she didn’t.

The love was gone from that place and she knew where to find it: in the heart of our neighbors who so lovingly took her in and made her their own.

Well done! And “Good Dog,” girl! May you rest In peace after a doggy life well lived!

Robin Bugbee recently moved back to Rhode Island, where he lives in a “sweet little house” in Riverside, after living in Charleston, South Carolina for eight years. He is currently a hospice chaplain in Rhode Island and loves his work. 

This post was originally written in 2018 and republished with permission of the author.