What Ever Happened to Sunday Dinner? Part III. It Fades - Dr. Ed Iannuccilli

What Ever Happened to Sunday Dinner? Part III. It Fades - Dr. Ed Iannuccilli

Sunday was the day when you were at your best with clothes, shoes, and behavior in preparation for church, a ride, a visit and for Sunday dinner, a day for family, food and conversation.   

When I suggest at presentations that the special day has dwindled and nearly disappeared, many are quick to raise their hands, “We still have Sunday dinner!”

“But is it the same as those days when grandmother directed it every week, when the entire family, and often friends, were there and when it lasted for the entire afternoon without interruption? With no distractions? And the street was quiet? When stores were closed? When to hear a truck horn was a shock?

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“Well, no, not quite.” And that’s my point. The Sunday dinner as we knew it has disappeared.

There are many reasons that might explain what happened.

Grandparents grew old and eventually passed. There were fewer family gatherings. We grew families of our own. We were fortunate in that my mother continued those Sundays for some years, her sisters often stopping by for coffee, not for the full dinner because they had their own families at their homes.  When Mom passed, we lost those Sunday gatherings. Save for holidays, our extended families did not dine together.

Some believe that Sunday dinner was a way to celebrate success in America. An abundance of food, once only at the table of the rich, was now at their table. Success in a new world may have changed those needs. Perhaps.

After the war, the American Dream evolved with the GI Bill. Veterans were now able to complete their education at a minimal cost. And with FHA Loans, they bought or built homes some distance away from the neighborhood compound. Becoming more educated and more independent, and chagrined by the treatment of Italians during the war, they no longer wanted to be associated with the old neighborhood where their parents talked funny and dressed funny. Old customs were dying. The web of the family was thinning.

The hypnotic thrum of conversation diminished. We became a more mobile society, with access to phones and television. More mobile? Where are the kids on Sunday if they are not participating in one of the many (organized for them) sports events? You’re likely to find them at the mall, shopping. The purchasing power of youth, something we never had, crept in. As did automobiles.

And now came major distractions with college, cable TV, DVDs and the internet.

We have been swept away, suffering with the haste of society and the need for immediacy; the speed of the internet, the design of, and easy access to, social media with its power in how people interact with one another.

I had the opportunity of experiencing the love, respect, partnership, and joy of family with my grandmother’s Sunday dinners.  Similarly, my children had the opportunity to experience my Mom’s Sunday Dinners.

Sadly, that has disappeared. Can we get it back? Maybe. What do you think?