Fit for Life: Are You Willing or Are You Needy?
Matt Espeut, GoLocal Contributor
Fit for Life: Are You Willing or Are You Needy?
Or do you let them sink in, decipher them and apply them to your everyday life in different ways.
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Some quotes are just “ra ra” words to get people hyped up, and others have substantial meaning that go deeper than being just words.
I heard two different quotes at different times last week, that not only resonated with me, but they relate to one another.
The first one is “Spend your time helping the willing, not the needy” and the other one is “Everyone should be treated fairly, but not necessary equally.” Let’s take a minute and dissect the meaning of these and why they mean so much.
Help the willing, not the needy: This is something I learned a long time ago when I was in a supermarket, and commented on someone’s food choices. I was basically told to “mind my own fuc*@ing business”.
Since then, I have a policy. I don’t give any health or fitness advice unless I am asked, or you are a paying me for it.
With the national statistics surrounding metabolic disease and obesity, many people NEED my guidance, coaching, and advice, yet only a small percentage are WILLING to accept it.
The folks that opt into my ads, show up for their first workout, and continue with us on their journey to better health and fitness are the ones WILLING to put in the time, effort and energy, and I am grateful and honored to help them achieve success. I will go out of my way to help these people to the best of my ability in any way I can.
The people that keep their head in the sand, drink tons of soda, eat fast food, need the help, but aren’t willing to make any sacrifices to better themselves. These are the people I am not capable of helping.
Just go to the doctor and observe the waiting room and the condition of the people in it.
If they were willing to make a change, most wouldn’t be there, or be on the numerous prescription meds they ingest daily.
It’s not that they don’t know, as there is an abundance of info within reach, they either don’t care or aren’t willing to better their situation. They aren’t willing to listen to solutions, or advice that will improve their health.
Willing comes with a cost, which is why most aren’t willing to improve. It takes work, discipline and sacrifice to make changes on all levels, and humans are programed to seek comfort and the path of least resistance.
Take the people on the street corners carrying cardboard signs for instance. Now I know mental health plays a big factor in most cases, however some are capable, but are not WILLING to do anything to change their situation.
Example: During a windy day a couple years back, trash was blown all over the parking lot at Providence Fit Body Boot Camp, so I stopped by a person standing at an intersection and offered $20 to come pick up the trash, and he refused, saying he didn’t want to work, he just needed money.
WTF I though, as I drove away frustrated. I wanted to help, but the guy (young and capable) wasn’t willing to work.
We all “need” money to survive and we need even more if we want to thrive, however willingness is what separates income brackets.
Yes sometimes luck, and intelligence plays a factor, but I have seen some not very smart people make a lot of money because they are willing to make the sacrifices.
If you are willing to get up early, get to the gym, go to bed on time, eat healthy food, work on the weekends, holidays and put in the extra effort required, then you have a better chance of success than some needy person, just waiting for someone to save them.
When you are willing to make the sacrifices, the outcome becomes more favorable.
“Treat everyone fairly, not equally”, has similar characteristics as the willing vs needy quote, because not everyone exerts the same amount of energy and deserves to be treated equally.
Everyone should be treated with respect and decency, but not treated equally. Let me explain my view points on this.
Think of tenure jobs that implement a pay scale based on time with an organization. You can have 2 people that make the same due to their tenure, but one over performs and one underperforms. They are being treated equally, yet not fairly due to the amount of time spent on the job and the structure built to give raises.
I am a true believer that raises and acknowledgment should be based on performance, and it is fair to reward someone that over performs and not treat the underperformers equally.
When it comes to team sports, it’s fair to say that the faster, tougher running back should get more carries than the one who is slower and fumbles the ball regularly during a football game.
That’s fair, but not equal, and I’m ok with that scenario, if you want the team to win.
I don’t believe in treating everyone equally because not everyone is willing to carry their weight equally, and I consider it fair to reward those that go above and beyond their call of duty.
When it comes to finances and I see someone that has more than me, I don’t cry that it’s not fair that they have more than me, because it is, and I don’t expect someone to give me their overflow, just so we can have an equal amount.
They either worked harder, took more risks than me or made better decisions in life than me, therefore I think it’s justifiably fair that they have more cash in the bank than I do.
To wrap this up and put a bow on it, just remember, when you are willing to make the sacrifice and willing to put in the work, you have more probability of having someone want to help you.
Being needy puts a burden on the people around you, and it makes it unlikely anyone will want to help.
The same goes for if you want to be treated equally.
Just do the equal amount of work, put in the equal effort and you will enhance the probabilities of being treated as equally as than those around you.
Committed to helping the willing and treating everyone fairly.
Coach Matt